tjaymadison
05-31-2001, 09:26 AM
From Fred Langa's Langalist:
A great site BTW, by an editor of the now-defunct PCMag web site.
www.langa.com (http://www.langa.com)
1. Big companies don't do business via chain letters and there are no
computer programs that track how many times an e-mail is forwarded, let
alone by whom. Bill Gates is not giving you $1000, Disney is not giving
you a free vacation, and Nokia is not giving away free cell phones to
those who email the most messages. There also is no baby food company
issuing class action checks to emailers.
2. Proctor and Gamble is not part of a satanic cult or scheme, and its
logo is not satanic.
3. MTV will not give you backstage passes if you forward something to
the most people.
4. The Gap is not giving away free clothes. You can relax; there is no
need to pass it on "just in case it's true."
5. There is no kidney theft ring in New Orleans. No one is waking up in
a bathtub full of ice, even if a friend of a friend swears it happened
to their cousin. If you are hell bent on believing the kidney theft ring
stories, see http://urbanlegends.tqn.com/library/weekly/aa062997.htm
And I quote "The National Kidney Foundation has repeatedly issued
requests for actual victims of organ thieves to come forward and tell
their stories." None have. That's "none" as in "zero." Not even your
friend's cousin.
6. Neiman Marcus doesn't really sell a $200 cookie recipe. And even if
they do, we all have it. And even if you don't, you can get a copy at
http://www.bl.net/forwards/cookie.html . If you make the recipe
and decide the cookies are that awesome, feel free to pass the recipe on.
7. If the latest NASA rocket disaster(s) DID contain plutonium that
spread radioactive particulates over the eastern seaboard, do you REALLY
think this information would reach the public via an AOL chain letter?
8. There is no "Good Times" or "It Takes Guts To Say Jesus" or any
number of other similar supposed viruses. In fact, you should never,
ever, ever forward any email containing any virus warning unless you
first confirm it at an actual site of an actual company that actually
deals with actual viruses. AOL, for example, is not in the antivirus
business. (Some would say AOL itself is a virus, but that's another
story.) The fact that someone says "AOL confirmed the existence of this
virus!" is meaningless. Try http://www.symantec.com/avcenter/index.html
And even if the virus IS real, don't forward the warning. We don't care;
we keep our antivirus scanner up to date, and know better than to open
unknown file attachments.
9. There is no gang initiation plot to murder any motorist who flashes
headlights at another car driving at night with out lights.
10. If you still absolutely MUST forward that 10th-generation message
from a friend, at least have the decency to trim the eight miles of
headers showing everyone else who's received it over the last 6 months.
It sure wouldn't hurt to get rid of all the ".." that begin each line
either. Besides, if it has gone around that many times we've probably
already seen it.
11. Craig Shergold (or Sherwood, or Sherman, etc.) in England is not
dying of cancer or anything else at this time and would like everyone to
stop sending him their business cards. He apparently is no longer a
"little boy" either.
12. The "Make a Wish" foundation is a real organization doing fine work,
but they have had to establish a special toll free hot line in response
to the large number of Internet hoaxes using their good name and
reputation. It is distracting them from the important work they do.
Also, the American Cancer Society does not give 3 cents for each person
you forward e-mail to. They ask for you to *donate* money, they don't
*give* it; and, besides, how could they know how many e-mails you
sent out? Sheesh.
13. If you are one of those insufferable idiots who forwards anything
that promises something bad will happen "if you don't forward it" to X
people or within X timeframe, then something bad *will* happen to *you*
if I ever meet you in a dark alley.
14. Women really are suffering in Afghanistan, but forwarding an e-mail
won't help their cause in the least. If you want to help, contact your
local legislative representative, or get in touch with Amnesty
International or the Red Cross.
15. As a general rule, e-mail "signatures" and "From:" lines are easily
faked and mean nothing.
16. KFC really does use real chickens with feathers and beaks and feet
and everything. No, they really do. Why did they change their name? In
this health conscious world, what was KFC's name? Kentucky FRIED
Chicken. FRIED is not healthy. So with the help of a focus group, they
changed the name to KFC. It's short, doesn't offend dieters and it's
easy to remember.
17. Another thing, just because someone said in a message, four generations
back, that "we checked it out and it's legit," or "we know a lawyer who
says it must be true or he will be sued!" does not actually make it true.
PS: There is no bill pending before Congress that will allow the Post
Office to charge you for sending email.
Bottom Line...
Composing e-mail or posting something on the Net is as easy as writing
on the walls of a public rest room, and about as likely a source of truth.
Don't automatically believe anything...ASSUME it's false, unless there
is real proof (and not just someone's unverified claim) that it's true.
------------------
"I am not able to rightly apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such a question."
-- Charles Babbage, mathematician, computer pioneer, analytical engine designer (1791-1871)
-- (Question: 'Pray, Mr. Babbage, if you put into the machine wrong figures, will the right answers come out?')
"Just because I don't care, doesn't mean I don't understand."
-- Homer Simpson
A great site BTW, by an editor of the now-defunct PCMag web site.
www.langa.com (http://www.langa.com)
1. Big companies don't do business via chain letters and there are no
computer programs that track how many times an e-mail is forwarded, let
alone by whom. Bill Gates is not giving you $1000, Disney is not giving
you a free vacation, and Nokia is not giving away free cell phones to
those who email the most messages. There also is no baby food company
issuing class action checks to emailers.
2. Proctor and Gamble is not part of a satanic cult or scheme, and its
logo is not satanic.
3. MTV will not give you backstage passes if you forward something to
the most people.
4. The Gap is not giving away free clothes. You can relax; there is no
need to pass it on "just in case it's true."
5. There is no kidney theft ring in New Orleans. No one is waking up in
a bathtub full of ice, even if a friend of a friend swears it happened
to their cousin. If you are hell bent on believing the kidney theft ring
stories, see http://urbanlegends.tqn.com/library/weekly/aa062997.htm
And I quote "The National Kidney Foundation has repeatedly issued
requests for actual victims of organ thieves to come forward and tell
their stories." None have. That's "none" as in "zero." Not even your
friend's cousin.
6. Neiman Marcus doesn't really sell a $200 cookie recipe. And even if
they do, we all have it. And even if you don't, you can get a copy at
http://www.bl.net/forwards/cookie.html . If you make the recipe
and decide the cookies are that awesome, feel free to pass the recipe on.
7. If the latest NASA rocket disaster(s) DID contain plutonium that
spread radioactive particulates over the eastern seaboard, do you REALLY
think this information would reach the public via an AOL chain letter?
8. There is no "Good Times" or "It Takes Guts To Say Jesus" or any
number of other similar supposed viruses. In fact, you should never,
ever, ever forward any email containing any virus warning unless you
first confirm it at an actual site of an actual company that actually
deals with actual viruses. AOL, for example, is not in the antivirus
business. (Some would say AOL itself is a virus, but that's another
story.) The fact that someone says "AOL confirmed the existence of this
virus!" is meaningless. Try http://www.symantec.com/avcenter/index.html
And even if the virus IS real, don't forward the warning. We don't care;
we keep our antivirus scanner up to date, and know better than to open
unknown file attachments.
9. There is no gang initiation plot to murder any motorist who flashes
headlights at another car driving at night with out lights.
10. If you still absolutely MUST forward that 10th-generation message
from a friend, at least have the decency to trim the eight miles of
headers showing everyone else who's received it over the last 6 months.
It sure wouldn't hurt to get rid of all the ".." that begin each line
either. Besides, if it has gone around that many times we've probably
already seen it.
11. Craig Shergold (or Sherwood, or Sherman, etc.) in England is not
dying of cancer or anything else at this time and would like everyone to
stop sending him their business cards. He apparently is no longer a
"little boy" either.
12. The "Make a Wish" foundation is a real organization doing fine work,
but they have had to establish a special toll free hot line in response
to the large number of Internet hoaxes using their good name and
reputation. It is distracting them from the important work they do.
Also, the American Cancer Society does not give 3 cents for each person
you forward e-mail to. They ask for you to *donate* money, they don't
*give* it; and, besides, how could they know how many e-mails you
sent out? Sheesh.
13. If you are one of those insufferable idiots who forwards anything
that promises something bad will happen "if you don't forward it" to X
people or within X timeframe, then something bad *will* happen to *you*
if I ever meet you in a dark alley.
14. Women really are suffering in Afghanistan, but forwarding an e-mail
won't help their cause in the least. If you want to help, contact your
local legislative representative, or get in touch with Amnesty
International or the Red Cross.
15. As a general rule, e-mail "signatures" and "From:" lines are easily
faked and mean nothing.
16. KFC really does use real chickens with feathers and beaks and feet
and everything. No, they really do. Why did they change their name? In
this health conscious world, what was KFC's name? Kentucky FRIED
Chicken. FRIED is not healthy. So with the help of a focus group, they
changed the name to KFC. It's short, doesn't offend dieters and it's
easy to remember.
17. Another thing, just because someone said in a message, four generations
back, that "we checked it out and it's legit," or "we know a lawyer who
says it must be true or he will be sued!" does not actually make it true.
PS: There is no bill pending before Congress that will allow the Post
Office to charge you for sending email.
Bottom Line...
Composing e-mail or posting something on the Net is as easy as writing
on the walls of a public rest room, and about as likely a source of truth.
Don't automatically believe anything...ASSUME it's false, unless there
is real proof (and not just someone's unverified claim) that it's true.
------------------
"I am not able to rightly apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such a question."
-- Charles Babbage, mathematician, computer pioneer, analytical engine designer (1791-1871)
-- (Question: 'Pray, Mr. Babbage, if you put into the machine wrong figures, will the right answers come out?')
"Just because I don't care, doesn't mean I don't understand."
-- Homer Simpson