PDA

View Full Version : Try a little kindness



FrankSG
09-28-2001, 12:36 PM
This is a decent forum--one of the most decent that I've seen. Most of the Posts and Replies that I see on this forum are very respectful. But I've seen a few--fortunately very few--that come across in a very undiplomatic and unkind way. What I'm trying to say is this: We have every right to express our point of view, and we have every right to disagree with whom ever we please. But, in my opinion, a person can get his/her point across without being harsh, rude or insulting. If we have something that we dislike, let's try to express it in such a manner as to show some respect to everyone. As I mentioned, there are very few negative ones, but let's try to eliminate it completely. If you're trying to get your point of view across, lets try a little gentleness. And a big tip o' the hat to Charles for providing this for us. Peace!


------------------
"Nothing is so strong as gentleness; nothing so gentle as real strength."

kayofcircles
09-28-2001, 01:09 PM
I have not seen anything I would call harsh or unkind in the technical parts of this forum in a long time. The After Hours part sometimes gets a bit rowdy, but we Americans have free speech, and Pete makes sure it doesn't get too heated. I agree with everything you're saying, BUT you have to realize that when you direct someone to do something, some of us contrary ones (including me) respond with "Oh yeah? Who is gonna make me?" And none of us have any control over the way that someone reads our post, no matter how diplomatic and "kind" we tried to be..that someone might still read something into the post that wasn't there. A good example is me reading your post..even though I agree with what you said, I also heard my mother's voice in my head saying, "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all" which also activated a certain amount of internal rebellion...the "oh yeah?" I mentioned above.

Personally, I think we are all doing awesomely considering the emotional background noises we're operating under from recent horrific events.

FrankSG
09-28-2001, 01:34 PM
Originally posted by kayofcircles:
I have not seen anything I would call harsh or unkind in the technical parts of this forum in a long time. The After Hours part sometimes gets a bit rowdy, but we Americans have free speech, and Pete makes sure it doesn't get too heated. I agree with everything you're saying, BUT you have to realize that when you direct someone to do something, some of us contrary ones (including me) respond with "Oh yeah? Who is gonna make me?" And none of us have any control over the way that someone reads our post, no matter how diplomatic and "kind" we tried to be..that someone might still read something into the post that wasn't there. A good example is me reading your post..even though I agree with what you said, I also heard my mother's voice in my head saying, "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all" which also activated a certain amount of internal rebellion...the "oh yeah?" I mentioned above.

Personally, I think we are all doing awesomely considering the emotional background noises we're operating under from recent horrific events.

Well--actually, I'm not directing anyone to do anything--it was just a suggestion. I guess we all have different personalities and express ourself in different ways. But, I really did see one that was very harsh with Charles. You are right when you said that Americans have free speech. I agree with you, and I am in no way trying to tell anyone not to express themselves. Just suggesting that we ought to try to be a little kinder in the way that we express it. Oh, well. That's only my opinion. That doesn't mean that I'm right. It's just my opinion. You certainly have a right to disagree with me. I'm going to go out and have my self a big slice of apple pie. That will sure make me feel better. If you were here, we could enjoy a piece together. Have a good day.

------------------
"Nothing is so strong as gentleness; nothing so gentle as real strength."

hiredgoonz
09-28-2001, 05:08 PM
Man, if you think people are being disrespectful on this board, I recommend you not go to any other message forums...

I continue to be amazed at the level of respect and lack of vulgarity here and I can only think of a very few times where somebody was out of line.

Some discussions become more heated than others, have you never had a tense discussion with a friend/relative? The "community" here is basically a collection of people who are friends, sometimes they get along better than others...

Obviously, one should always be respectful to others, so I'm not sure why you felt this reminder was necessary. Additionally, Pete is always here to step in if things get out of hand (truthfully, I wonder how he reads all this stuff)

------------------
When all else fails, read the instructions.

YODA74
09-28-2001, 05:25 PM
Hear! Hear! I either seconed or reasemble that motion! HE HE

------------------
What have I gotten my self Into now (ROFLMA0)

[This message has been edited by YODA74 (edited 09-28-2001).]

FrankSG
09-28-2001, 05:43 PM
Originally posted by YODA74:
Hear! Hear! I either seconed or reasemble that motion! HE HE



I think where I made my mistake was posting what I did where I did--on this topic. Where I saw the remark that I thought was harsh was probably on one of the other topics. That's where I should have posted. I'm new on this--just got registered the other day. I should have read some of the posts here before I spoke up. Sorry that I put my mouth in gear before I engaged my brain.

------------------
"Nothing is so strong as gentleness; nothing so gentle as real strength."

Dogdaysdude
09-28-2001, 06:41 PM
Kay, I have been reading your posts here and I really appreciate your attitude. http://www.PCGuide.com/ubb/smile.gif

To others who think this forum is rough, you should see what the Usenet newsgroups are like. Wow.

------------------
"I try to think but nuthin' happens!" - Curly

geebee76
09-28-2001, 07:05 PM
Hey Frank, Welcome to the Forum

Don't feel too bad http://www.PCGuide.com/ubb/frown.gif
I think you will have noticed by the responses you've had that the good people of this forum do act with the utmost respect even when replying to a comment they disagree with.
I know there have been a few instances when perhaps the tone of a reply could be considered a little disrespectful but we are all guilty of the odd off day. I, have myself sometimes looked at a post of my own and thought, oooh I hope that my response isn't taken the wrong way. It is sometimes difficult to convey a message without the use of body language.

I believe that as you spend more time here yourself, you too will come to the conclusion that the people of this forum should in fact be applauded.

http://www.PCGuide.com/ubb/smile.gif

------------------
You are making progress if each mistake is a new one!

Sig from Here (http://www.oneliners-and-proverbs.com/)

geebee76@hotmail.com

FrankSG
09-28-2001, 08:47 PM
Originally posted by geebee76:


Thanks. You are right. I looked at a lot of the posts--everybody seems to be quit respectful.


------------------
"No one stands so tall as when they stoop to help a child"

diurnal
09-28-2001, 09:42 PM
i understand what your saying frank about people being kinda direspectful sometimes about technical sitruations. Believe me we are trying to do the best we can for you. By asking straight forward questions like "tell me your system infomation" can sound disrespectful at times but its only so we can understand your situation a little bit better. I know i thought some were being rude or mean to me sometimes when i first registered here, but i soon found out that people were doing the best they could to help me. Believe me you will get used to it . http://www.PCGuide.com/ubb/wink.gif But once you settle in here you will find out that this forum and the people that run it and use it are the most respectful,nicest forum there is. Like hiredgoonz said you have not seen disrespectful until you go to other forums, i seen very bad and down right hateful forums. Yes when we debate(about products) we can get very ugly but you will not see threatful or profanite words, we keep our cool and are very professional. Hope you stick around and could you mind giving me some of that pie.

------------------
Sledgehammer will save the day!

Rick
09-28-2001, 09:50 PM
You may notice that we all have our own way of doing things.
I for one Know that I have a tendency to be Blunt .
Sometime this is taken the wrong way.

Itís well intended Just taken wrong.

------------------
To ERR is HUMAN
To REALLY screw things UP, YOU NEED a COMPUTER !

iisbob
09-28-2001, 09:59 PM
I'll be the first to admit to being a little " unrulely " sometimes, but i never met a sign post i couldn't argue with! http://www.PCGuide.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

Try not to read anything negative into the postings, sometimes people just aren't very articulative ( is that a word? http://www.PCGuide.com/ubb/tongue.gif ), and they may sound rude-but they're not.

I've found that when it comes to conversation, reading vs. face to face, many different conclusions can be drawn, and they can ( and usually are ) wrong ones.

Feel free to speak here as you wish, freedom of speech is not really just an American right-it is everyone's right-we just made sure it would be ther in black and white so there would be no misunderstanding by the power's that be. http://www.PCGuide.com/ubb/wink.gif

------------------
iisbob
"640K ought to be enough for anybody. - Bill Gates, 1981"
"Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world." --Albert Einstein (1879-1955)

[This message has been edited by iisbob (edited 09-28-2001).]

bassvax
09-29-2001, 12:34 AM
Hey Frank, I think I know which posting(s) you are referring to...Looked pretty rude to me as well, but that is definitely a rarety here http://www.PCGuide.com/ubb/smile.gif

Welcome the the PC Guide Discussion Forums http://www.PCGuide.com/ubb/smile.gif

------------------
Join the Circus (http://www.helpfromtechs.com/cgi-bin/ubb/ultimatebb.cgi) friday nights.

Flush 'N' Forget (http://www2.apex.net/users/hwuswtp)

Paleo Pete
09-29-2001, 02:49 AM
Frank, 1st of all I think this is as good a place as any for this topic, no reason to apologize for putting it here.

I think what you might be seeing is peoples' character. Some are laid back and easy going, some are more blunt or straightforward. We do occasionally have a rude, insulting or defamatory comment or 3 but usually these folks are the best around, and the troublesome topics don't last long.

It also helps to realize that sometimes it's not difficult to get exasperated, especially when you try to deal with someone who seems not to read all the information posted, or doesn't answer specific questions that help us try to figure out a solution. After seeing several of those, sometimes it's not easy to maintain patience...

We're also working long-distance, and often with people who don't understand what we try to get across. That's not their fault, or ours, sometimes it's difficult to put technical information in understandable layman's terms for the "technically challenged". Patience only goes so far...

Who was it that mentioned wondering how I read all this stuff? hiredgoonz? That's why you don't see me trying to answer as many questions as I once did. I don't have time...I'd be here 24/7...but you can bet I read every post. Whether I show up and post a response or not, you never can tell...but I read them...I even brought a computer to my mother's house, where I am now, so when I come to visit I can keep up with things around here without tying up her machine. She's playing games on it right now...or was an hour ago...Eventually it will be part of a group of them, networked for family to play games on, with Internet Connection Sharing...it's going to be one nice game room when we get finished, every board game you can think of, cards, dice, dominoes, ping pong table, computers...



------------------
Support the right to keep and arm bears.
Note: Please post your questions on the forums, not in my email.

Computer Information Links (http://www.dreamwater.com/paleopete/computer.htm) has been moved, please update your bookmarks.

kayofcircles
09-29-2001, 12:54 PM
FrankSG : Absolutely, you are welcome to the Forum. I am sorry I didn't notice that. What others have said above is right, though. I spent about 30 minutes explaining to a dear friend of ours about file sizes and scanning pics. Drew him pics on a piece of paper, and explained it slowly and carefully..and in the end, he was still convinced that he could scan things in high resolutions without getting HUGE file sizes. Pete's comment of "Patience only goes so far..." is on target; I gave up. Here, when we're trying to do the same sort of thing..explain to a newbie what we need for troubleshooting or how to resolve a difficulty..sometimes the exasperation leaks through. I thought I was going to have to go overseas recently and get some needed info from a questioner.

Pete : Only a wee bit of this is sucking up..lol..but I wanted to post in another thread of how much I appreciate and admire what you do, but it didn't seem appropriate to post it there but I can here. Thank you very much. I have never really gone anywhere else to verify that this is the best on the Net, but this forum is most definitely the best in my book and a good deal of that is thanks to you.

FrankSG
09-30-2001, 09:21 AM
Thanks, Kay. And thanks to you too, Pete, for your response.
Peace and happiness to everone and their family.

------------------
"No one stands so tall as when they stoop to help a child"

yawningdog
09-30-2001, 04:55 PM
I agree wth Kay. Pete is the reason this forum is so cool.

------------------
Give a man a fish, and you feed him for a day. Teach him to use the net, and he wont bother you for weeks.