A poem by Dr.Zeuss?...

[neveryona]

Dr. Seuss Explains Why Computers Sometimes Crash
(Read this to yourself aloud - it's GREAT!)

If a packet hits a pocket on a socket on a port, and the bus is interrupted at a very last resort, and the access of the memory makes your floppy disk abort, then the socket packet pocket has an error to report.

If your cursor finds a menu item followed by a dash, and the double-clicking icon puts your window in the trash, and your data is corrupted cause the index doesn't hash, then your situation's hopeless and your system's gonna crash!

If the label on the cable on the table at your house says the network is connected to the button on your mouse, but your packets want to tunnel to another protocol, that's repeatedly rejected by the printer down the hall, and your screen is all distorted by the side effects of gauss, so your icons in the window are as wavy as a souse; then you may as well reboot and go out with a bang, 'cuz sure as I'm a poet, the sucker's gonna hang!

When the copy of your floppy's getting sloppy in the disk, and the macro code instructions cause unnecessary risk, then you'll have to flash the memory and you'll want to RAM your ROM then quickly turn off the computer and be sure to tell your Mom!

[ranchdog]

Mighty Fine.

------------------
I spent a lot of money on women... liquor... motorcycles.
The rest I just wasted.

[john5211]

Hey neveryona,

This is certainly a funny poem. It's been circulating on the internet and through countless joke lists for some time, and is usually (incorrectly) attributed to an anonymous source.

The author of the poem (Gene Ziegler, els1@cornell.edu), wrote a subsequent poem called 'Hang the Information Highwayman!' :

When a party writes a poem and he puts it on the net,
He writes for love not money, and he takes what he can get.
He writes to bring you pleasure, that's the nature of the game.
He writes for recognition and he's sure to sign his name.

I wrote the poem in question, but this will make you laugh,
the version circulating, is my work cut in half!
Someone didn't like it, I guess that's a cinch.
It passed around the internet, until it met the Grinch.

I've never met the miscreant who edited my work,
but when I close my eyes and try, I can see the jerk!
The eyes are tiny pixels, close together you will find,
they're only separated by his narrow little mind.

His fingernails are dirty as he types on sticky keys,
He lurks around the network and takes whatever he sees.
He edits, chops, appropriates, and strips away my name,
A scoundrel on the internet, a lowdown dirty shame.

I'd like to find this filcher, so I'll offer this reward.
I'll give away my Mac SE, throw in the power cord.
If you will help me track him down and hang his internets
This information highwayman deserves what'er he gets.

And if we fail to find him, I'll hit him with a curse.
His hard disk will start spinning counter-clockwise in reverse.
His screen will start to flicker, and his mouse will chase a hearse.
I'll teach that hacking larcenist to tamper with my verse!

If you want to see my uncut work, take heart, it's still alive
It's in NetGuide, page eighty-six, for March of ninty-five.

BTW, to see the original poem in its entirety, go to:

http://www.people.cornell.edu/pages/...r/DrSeuss.html

John

[This message has been edited by john5211 (edited 06-02-2002).]

[This message has been edited by john5211 (edited 06-02-2002).]

[neveryona]

Boy, did they ever hack that poem. WOW!!! Thanks for that John, that is a cool piece of info...being a personal fan of Dr.Zeuss myself, I would hate to have his name taken in vain like that... I like the real version way better...